Monk & Lou tee | Plenty jeans | Dolce vita boots | InPink bracelet | Oak + Fort initial ring
Currently listening to: Tycho – A Walk
I’ve come to realize that my most disliked question (in terms of relationship discussions) is “What do you love about him?” Your answers will never be enough for the person who is asking the question. Everyone’s answer will be different and if your answers include “funny, smart, respectful” they won’t even take it into consideration because apparently those are not reasons to love someone, because anyone can be like that.
Loving someone isn’t about a list of things that they are or aren’t. It’s like when you ask “What’s so great about New York City?” You can’t explain New York…it’s just a feeling. You have to be there to feel it and vibe with it. Many people will have the same experiences in NYC but it’s what they take away from it that makes them love it so much. Now, in context with the video from last week’s post on conditional and unconditional love – you can have conditions that set the bar but it will always still be a feeling that will be there even when the conditions are removed. In my opinion.
Am I making sense? I feel like it makes total sense in my head but not so much when I’m typing this out.
Anyways, today marks three weeks since PC and I broke up and he hasn’t made any effort whatsoever to contact me since the first week. Neither have I but I can’t be the first one, ya know? I made the effort in the first week and I think that’s enough to make it known how I feel. I miss him. It’s thrown me into major hermit mode and has me weighing what my standards are in terms of a romantic relationship or even a friendship.
Last week I received my silver “R” initial ring in the mail. Michelle, Bria and myself all wear our initial rings for the simple yet ultra cheesy purpose that we will never lower our standards. Don’t ask me how that works, it just does, we’re girls. I took my ring off one night at PC’s home while making pizza because the dough was crusting all over the ring.
I forgot my ring at his home and flew back to Vancouver without it. When I came back home that’s when I started to feel lost about our relationship and PC. I felt like I didn’t know where my standards were at. I forgot my standards like I forgot my ring.
Where it gets all symbolic is the fact that the man who broke my heart, who I mixed up my standards for… sent me back my ring.
Photos by Leonie.